As I have admitted several times in previous Cruxes, it can be very difficult to remain authentic these days. On so many different levels, there is extreme pressure on us to perform. Consequently, there is a growing risk of our posing…otherwise known as acting as though we have it all together…inside and out.
Many of us are working ourselves sick trying to catch up with the Joneses, never considering that they are likely trying to keep up with someone else. Social media has climbed on board to blast countless individuals away from their core and away from the things that will endure.
To be where we are in our journey and to be OK with being there is no small feat. Feeling and admitting to those feelings can require tremendous acts of courage. Unfortunately, many of us either try to dull the pain and disappointment or double down on our pursuit of happiness by setting our sights on the next heroic achievement.
Surprisingly, many Olympic athletes have admitted to having felt a tremendous amount of regret and disappointment at the very moment the gold medal was placed around their neck. Before their national anthem was finished playing and their country’s flag reached the rafters, they were asking themselves, “Is this it? Is this all that the blood, sweat and tears gets me?”
What an indictment of human achievement! There may always be a significant gap between what I hope to derive from a certain accomplishment and what will ultimately be delivered to the doorstep of my soul.
What sometimes blocks me from finding peace in my day is the judgment-of-self that results from my being “off” my game. I need to accept that it is OK to feel what I am feeling. A close friend shared his observation with me that while God used to speak to us through burning bushes, currently His favorite megaphone is our symptoms.
Each of us yearns for a life of significance. Each of us is trying to solve our own equation for how our lives will matter. However, we can sometimes do the stupidest things, believing that they will make us happy.
One way to pave a path to a life of misery is to dissociate ourselves from what we are feeling. To feel is our God-given homing mechanism to map our way back to truth and away from all the disordered attempts at finding lasting joy and contentment.
Make time to be more authentic and to get in deeper touch with what’s happening in your life. There are two critical elements to reflecting more deeply on where you are headed in important relationships. There is what is actually happening to you and then there are the things that you make-up about yourself and others to help in coping with it.
We need to make space for this important work or else risk waking up on some distant day, as our anthem is played asking, “Is this all there is? Is this what I gave my life for?”
Thomas “TD” Dierker
Live like you’re dying…. because you are!